Soapbox

The Kids are Not Alright

Blossom went after Tucker this morning.

   It has been a few weeks since I saw anything but the occasional… lets say "bossiness" from her. I thought she had worked that all out. They sometimes share the lambswool dog pad in the evenings while we watch TV.
   But I have gotten lazy, and stopped watching for 'claiming' behavior, where she tries to keep him away from me, which seemed to be the genesis for most of the problems between them in the past.
   We were all 3 in the front room and I was reading something on the computer and suddenly she was on him like a fury.

   Tucker tried to back out of the room but Blossom would not stand down. I lept to my feet and ran shouting after them as Blossom actually took him down the stairs in a roiling ball of fur and teeth.
   I caught up with them at the bottom and managed to get hold of her collar- she was still attacking!- and yanked her away. She immediately became compliant and walked quietly to the crate with Steve.

   Tucker was injured this time. Not seriously: a few tiny nicks on his nose and a scraped area high on one front leg that  still oozes a bit and no doubt stings but doesn't look bad. But it is the first time she ever actually laid a tooth on him- and that upsets me. Always before I thought she was just trying to dominate him, but not to really hurt him. This time, she bit.
   We're going backward.

   My trust and confidence have been injured too. I'm afraid to have them together now. Every time she even walks over to him I get anxious. This evening, after they ate, she started over to check out his empty bowl- a normal occurrance- except she darted her head in instead of just casually walkng over.
  Or did she? Was I imagining it? I grabbed her collar and pulled her away and put her back in the crate until I got Tucker upstairs and gated in the bedroom.

   Dopey me. I had this stupid idea that we were going to ride in like white knights and rescue Blossom, and  help her heal her emotional wounds, and wow what great dog people we are, aren't we? Pat yourself on the back, Trace!
   But I have used every trick in my small bag of tricks, and while I thought it was going well, i guess it wasn't. I don't know how to do this after all. I can't spend the rest of their days keeping them apart! Are they ok together when I"m not around? Is it safe to leave them alone if there is no human in the house for Blossom to 'claim" and fight over? I have always assumed so, but…

   As I sat with Tucker gently cleaning his scrapes and telling him what a fine, brave boy he was to let me do it, I started to tear up.
I love Blossom. She has a good heart, and is so affectionate… maybe she just needs to be an only dog. Maybe she needs a home where she gets all the love and doesn't have to share.
   But just the thought of finding somewhere else for her to live, making her start all over one more time, makes my stomach hurt. I feel like one of those people who adopt a Russian orphan and then it turns out the child has all these terrible adandonment issues and scream and break things and set fires so the parents give the child back.
Ick. 
   I don't want to do that. I feel like I have failed a sweet dog… but really, I don't know how to do this any way other than the way I have been doing it. And that doesn't seem to be working.