Soapbox

Hide and Don’t Seek

    The definition of 'friend' on Facebook is different for different people.
(For instance, anyone who has 2,000 Facebook 'friends' clerly defines that word differently than I do. I may be a bit of a recluse but nobody actually knows 2,000 people!)
     When I accept friend requests, I do it for several reasons: 1) I actually know, or have known the person or 2) We seem to share similar interests/views and I think I may enjoy and learn from the things they post.
    Being a person without a ton of friends, I am loath to lose them. I hate unfriending people- maybe because a few of those who have unfriended me have really stung. Also, it just seems judgemental and presumptuous. Who am I to say that this person is not worthy of scrolling past a status update on my wall? (I do make an exception for people who make blatantly bigoted statements. They are gone!)
 
   Rather than unfriend, I have hidden a few people whom I don't want to unfriend but from whom I just don't get anything. One woman I knew from church years ago is perfectly nice but all she EVER posts about is NASCAR. Literally all.
   And today I decided to hide someone else. He used to be a family friend long ago when we were all kids, and I made him a 'friend' because I wanted to get to know more about him after all these years. But that hasn't happened, and it's not going to.
    All he ever, ever posts about is his ministry. Nothing about how his day is going, how his kids are, what his dog did: there are less personal details in his posts than in a church newsletter. So I usually just scroll past, but out of politeness I sometimes read his stuff, as I did today with an article he assured me was 'amazing' and 'so loving!'.
    And it really wasn't.
    It was about loving Muslims 'without an agenda'.  First it pointed out that- poor Muslims!- their entire faith is based on a lie! And then it makes it clear that one is to love Muslims with all your might until you can bring them to Jesus. Not to verbally evangalize their poor miserable souls, but because through the power of your superior faith you can eventually show them that theirs is wrong.
    That sounds like an agenda to me!

    And I thought of saying something to that effect… but I also make it a point not to criticize people's religious posts. There's a woman I know from high school who posts these things that say (usually with an incorrect use of your/you're or their/there)  If you repost this post and prove your not ashamed of Jesus then God will bless you!
    I think is based on a mind-blowingly ridiculous theology, predicated that 1)You need to periodically 'buy' blessings from God and 2) God, the almighty creator of the Universe gives a s**t what you post on Facebook. But she is a genuinely sweet person who has a good heart, who paints and loves her dogs and actually interacts with me from time-to-time on FB. So I leave her to her theology as she leaves me to mine.

    So I"m looking at this post today and thinking,  All I ever get from this Facebook contact is religious stuff. Religious stuff that I either find utterly uninteresting or disagree with. Yet I feel compelled NOT to comment on religious stuff people post. So… why am I 'friends' with this person?
    I used to know him, 4 decades ago. But nothing he posts now will ever help me get to know him again- unless all he truly cares about is his ministry. In which case we have nothing in common and what's the point?

    So, I am hiding him from my wall. I guess I feel guilty about it or something- why else would I feel compelled to explain myself to my own blog? But there is just no there  there.